Gettin' Down in Chi-Town
…If He Stays Why? Dear Lucy, If you cheated on your boyfriend and your boyfriend found out is your boyfriend going to dump you or stay with you and if he stays why? The simple answer to this panicked run-on sentence is: how the hell should I know? You didn’t give me any details to work with. But I will do my best to answer to the subject in a completely objective manner.Cheating effects different couples in different ways. While there may be a social norm mentality of “cheating = break up,” I don’t necessarily think that is true for all relationships. So let’s explore why you were hypothetically cheating. Perhaps you are dissatisfied with something about your relationship with your boyfriend, and so you strayed. Maybe you are getting back at him for something he did wrong. Maybe you are seeking something that he is unable to give you, and so you tried to find it with someone else.Or maybe your relationship with your boyfriend is totally great, but you aren’t a monogamous person. I think it is possible to be romantically and/or sexually interested in more than one person at the same time. You may love your boyfriend, but you also have a crush on somebody else. And so you acted on that crush. Of course, you could have just gotten wasted and ended up in someone else’s bed, horrified (or delighted?) to find yourself there in the morning.So is your boyfriend going to dump you? Well, did you tell him you cheated? Or did he “find out” through the grapevine? It is more likely that he’ll be more pissed if he hears that information from someone other than you. No one likes to feel like an ignorant fool, or to be the last person to find out about something involving their own relationship. Chances of being dumped are higher in this case.But let’s say you tell him yourself, like a more decent cheater. He could still be very upset about your infidelities. He may, indeed, dump you right on the spot. Or after a few days of weepy arguments. Then again, you could find out that your boyf has a open side as well, and that he’s all about occasional forays into new sexual territories by you both. Maybe it’ll be the start of a beautiful, open relationship.But if he’s not polyamorous, and he “stays,” why would he do that? Well, my friend, maybe he really loves you. It is possible to be forgiven. So if that’s the case, don’t abuse his new attempt at trusting you.Xoxo, Lucy

…If He Stays Why?

Dear Lucy,

If you cheated on your boyfriend and your boyfriend found out is your boyfriend going to dump you or stay with you and if he stays why?

The simple answer to this panicked run-on sentence is: how the hell should I know? You didn’t give me any details to work with. But I will do my best to answer to the subject in a completely objective manner.

Cheating effects different couples in different ways. While there may be a social norm mentality of “cheating = break up,” I don’t necessarily think that is true for all relationships.

So let’s explore why you were hypothetically cheating. Perhaps you are dissatisfied with something about your relationship with your boyfriend, and so you strayed. Maybe you are getting back at him for something he did wrong. Maybe you are seeking something that he is unable to give you, and so you tried to find it with someone else.

Or maybe your relationship with your boyfriend is totally great, but you aren’t a monogamous person. I think it is possible to be romantically and/or sexually interested in more than one person at the same time. You may love your boyfriend, but you also have a crush on somebody else. And so you acted on that crush.

Of course, you could have just gotten wasted and ended up in someone else’s bed, horrified (or delighted?) to find yourself there in the morning.

So is your boyfriend going to dump you? Well, did you tell him you cheated? Or did he “find out” through the grapevine? It is more likely that he’ll be more pissed if he hears that information from someone other than you. No one likes to feel like an ignorant fool, or to be the last person to find out about something involving their own relationship. Chances of being dumped are higher in this case.

But let’s say you tell him yourself, like a more decent cheater. He could still be very upset about your infidelities. He may, indeed, dump you right on the spot. Or after a few days of weepy arguments. Then again, you could find out that your boyf has a open side as well, and that he’s all about occasional forays into new sexual territories by you both. Maybe it’ll be the start of a beautiful, open relationship.

But if he’s not polyamorous, and he “stays,” why would he do that? Well, my friend, maybe he really loves you. It is possible to be forgiven. So if that’s the case, don’t abuse his new attempt at trusting you.

Xoxo, Lucy

26 October 10
love advicerelationshipscheatingsex advice
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  1. aprilmorning reblogged this from gettingdowninchitown and added:
    miraras, Con ese destello, que...visto en los amantes bajo el sol imputable. Quédate...
  2. gettingdowninchitown posted this

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I'm Lucy. I live in Chicago and I like to talk about sex. Give me a topic: I'm happy to answer any questions about love, sex, and relationships. Email me at LucyRockwell@gmail.com


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