Gettin' Down in Chi-Town
Zodiac Sex Positions ReviewThis is the poster I had hanging on the wall during my college years. It is flocked with black velveteen, glows under a blacklight, and is a great reminder of the zodiac calendar. Oh, and it provides excellent ideas for sex positions to try throughout the year, each with a strange title! What more could you want from a wall hanging??Of course, each astrological sign has been tried by yours truly and a male companion, for better or for worse…CAPRICORN (December 21-January 20)- “Aware”Let us begin the year with the Reverse Cowgirl, shall we? Considering that Capricorn is actually the sign of the sea-goat (an animal which is now extinct), we can infer that the sex positions represented on the poster have little to do with the correlating zodiac symbol. In any case, Reverse Cowgirl is a delight for the woman and the man. The girl gets to be in control, moving at the speed she wishes. The guy gets an excellent view (Guy on Poster certainly seems “aware” of this), with plenty of opportunity for ass grabbin’ and slappin’. Plus, who doesn’t want to be called “Cowgirl?” AQUARIUS (January 20-February 18)- “Humanitarian”This position can only be described as “Girl on Top of Dead Guy.” Yes, it’s awesome to be on top, but why is Guy on Poster lying there catatonically? Perhaps she is a necrophiliac and snuck into the morgue in the middle of the night. Or maybe I’m interpreting this image incorrectly and she’s a real “humanitarian” trying to pick up a drowning victim. But if this is really meant to be a positive sexual experience with both members alive and well, why is the guy lying there with his arms flopped to the sides? Show a little interest, man!PISCES (February 18-March 20)- “Provider”Aw yeah, missionary! Guy on Poster is “providing” the Girl with some sweet loving, and she seems to be enjoying it! Missionary is the international symbol of sex, accepted the world around. And there are so many reasons to love it: lots of skin-to-skin contact, kissing, whispering sweet nothings, the girl wrapping her legs around the guy. Yes, it’s good to mix it up, but sometimes there’s nothing like a nice missionary tumble in the hay.
STAY TUNED FOR THE NEXT ROUND OF ZODIAC SEX POSITION TRIALS!

Zodiac Sex Positions Review

This is the poster I had hanging on the wall during my college years. It is flocked with black velveteen, glows under a blacklight, and is a great reminder of the zodiac calendar. Oh, and it provides excellent ideas for sex positions to try throughout the year, each with a strange title! What more could you want from a wall hanging??

Of course, each astrological sign has been tried by yours truly and a male companion, for better or for worse…

CAPRICORN (December 21-January 20)- “Aware”

Let us begin the year with the Reverse Cowgirl, shall we? Considering that Capricorn is actually the sign of the sea-goat (an animal which is now extinct), we can infer that the sex positions represented on the poster have little to do with the correlating zodiac symbol. In any case, Reverse Cowgirl is a delight for the woman and the man. The girl gets to be in control, moving at the speed she wishes. The guy gets an excellent view (Guy on Poster certainly seems “aware” of this), with plenty of opportunity for ass grabbin’ and slappin’. Plus, who doesn’t want to be called “Cowgirl?”

AQUARIUS (January 20-February 18)- “Humanitarian”
This position can only be described as “Girl on Top of Dead Guy.” Yes, it’s awesome to be on top, but why is Guy on Poster lying there catatonically? Perhaps she is a necrophiliac and snuck into the morgue in the middle of the night. Or maybe I’m interpreting this image incorrectly and she’s a real “humanitarian” trying to pick up a drowning victim. But if this is really meant to be a positive sexual experience with both members alive and well, why is the guy lying there with his arms flopped to the sides? Show a little interest, man!

PISCES (February 18-March 20)- “Provider”
Aw yeah, missionary! Guy on Poster is “providing” the Girl with some sweet loving, and she seems to be enjoying it! Missionary is the international symbol of sex, accepted the world around. And there are so many reasons to love it: lots of skin-to-skin contact, kissing, whispering sweet nothings, the girl wrapping her legs around the guy. Yes, it’s good to mix it up, but sometimes there’s nothing like a nice missionary tumble in the hay.

STAY TUNED FOR THE NEXT ROUND OF ZODIAC SEX POSITION TRIALS!

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    Who wants to try them all with me?
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    CHI-TOWN forgote...I still LOVE THIS I did get
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I'm Lucy. I live in Chicago and I like to talk about sex. Give me a topic: I'm happy to answer any questions about love, sex, and relationships. Email me at LucyRockwell@gmail.com


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