Gettin' Down in Chi-Town
Masturbation for the Ladies 2: Finding the Sweet Spot Dear Lucy,This question is lame and embarrassing, but I dont know HOW to masturbate (I’m a female). Women have three holes I know that, but I’m not sure which one is the “masturbation” or “insert penis here” hole. My boyfriend and I have been dating for a year and I’ve never achieved orgasm when he fingers me because I can’t tell- he isn’t going in far enough. HELP D:Oh dear! OK, don’t be embarrassed; I didn’t know there were multiple holes in a vagina for a good while. Yes, there are 3 holes in your genital ares. One is your urethra, one is your vagina, and one is your anus. (See diagram) The middle one, your vagina, is the “insert here” hole for sexual intercourse with a penis. The other two can be stimulated for sexual pleasure, but you can get to that later in your sexual awakening, once you’ve got the vagina figured out.Inserting things (your fingers, your boyfriend’s fingers, a dildo/vibrator or penis-shaped object, and, eventually, a penis) into your vagina will give you sexual pleasure. This may not, however, be enough to give you an orgasm. What is really important in your own masturbation exploration is to discover your clitoris! (Again, see diagram)This little nub, located above your urethral opening (where you pee) is loaded with nerve endings. This organ acts the same as a man’s penis- rub it, and you will be sexually stimulated. So, that’s what I suggest you do: locate your clitoris, lick your fingers to get them wet (or use some lube), and rub around on your clit. Rub in circles, up and down, side to side, hard or soft, slow or fast. Vary it up and learn what makes you feel the best. Eventually you sill start to feel hot, tingly, and sweaty perhaps. Not just Down There; you may also feel hot and tingly in your nipples, your face, or other parts of your body. You might have a clitoral orgasm the first time you try masturbating this way, or you may not. Keep going for it, though, and guide your boyfriend’s fingers to your clit as well. You may then want to combine penetration of your vagina with clitoral stimulation. By this I mean, keep one hand playing with your clit, while pushing something in and out of your vaginal hole. As for “going in far enough,” the first couple inches of your vaginal opening are super sensitive, so you may not even have to put something too far inside you to feel amazing. Again, try different things (speed, depth, objects) until you find your perfect combo.For more information, check out my in-depth article on Masturbation for the Ladies, including more techniques, and why masturbation is good for your health!Xoxo,Lucy

Masturbation for the Ladies 2: Finding the Sweet Spot

Dear Lucy,
This question is lame and embarrassing, but I dont know HOW to masturbate (I’m a female). Women have three holes I know that, but I’m not sure which one is the “masturbation” or “insert penis here” hole. My boyfriend and I have been dating for a year and I’ve never achieved orgasm when he fingers me because I can’t tell- he isn’t going in far enough. HELP D:

Oh dear! OK, don’t be embarrassed; I didn’t know there were multiple holes in a vagina for a good while. Yes, there are 3 holes in your genital ares. One is your urethra, one is your vagina, and one is your anus. (See diagram) The middle one, your vagina, is the “insert here” hole for sexual intercourse with a penis. The other two can be stimulated for sexual pleasure, but you can get to that later in your sexual awakening, once you’ve got the vagina figured out.vagina

Inserting things (your fingers, your boyfriend’s fingers, a dildo/vibrator or penis-shaped object, and, eventually, a penis) into your vagina will give you sexual pleasure. This may not, however, be enough to give you an orgasm. What is really important in your own masturbation exploration is to discover your clitoris! (Again, see diagram)

This little nub, located above your urethral opening (where you pee) is loaded with nerve endings. This organ acts the same as a man’s penis- rub it, and you will be sexually stimulated. So, that’s what I suggest you do: locate your clitoris, lick your fingers to get them wet (or use some lube), and rub around on your clit. Rub in circles, up and down, side to side, hard or soft, slow or fast. Vary it up and learn what makes you feel the best. Eventually you sill start to feel hot, tingly, and sweaty perhaps. Not just Down There; you may also feel hot and tingly in your nipples, your face, or other parts of your body.

You might have a clitoral orgasm the first time you try masturbating this way, or you may not. Keep going for it, though, and guide your boyfriend’s fingers to your clit as well. You may then want to combine penetration of your vagina with clitoral stimulation. By this I mean, keep one hand playing with your clit, while pushing something in and out of your vaginal hole.

As for “going in far enough,” the first couple inches of your vaginal opening are super sensitive, so you may not even have to put something too far inside you to feel amazing. Again, try different things (speed, depth, objects) until you find your perfect combo.

For more information, check out my in-depth article on Masturbation for the Ladies, including more techniques, and why masturbation is good for your health!

Xoxo,
Lucy

29 January 31
sex advicemasturbationclitorisvagina
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I'm Lucy. I live in Chicago and I like to talk about sex. Give me a topic: I'm happy to answer any questions about love, sex, and relationships. Email me at LucyRockwell@gmail.com


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