I’ll Take Mine King-Sized, Thank you…

Hello my dears,

Thought you might want a little update on what my boyfriend, Lance, and I have been doing lately. Well, we just got back from a four-day trip with his family. The trip was pretty great, lots of good places to eat and wonderful things to see, but really there was one highlight for me: the hotel bed.

Our hotel was pretty decked out, and beautiful. I was super excited to stay there, and when Lance and I entered our hotel room, I almost xdied with happiness. Taking up most of the room was a huge, four-poster, pillow-top, fluffy, down-comforter-covered, warm, giant, luxurious, delightful king-sized bed! At that point I sighed dramatically, realizing that, yes, I would have to go out at some point during the trip. I could not spend the whole time in the beautiful bed, but I could sure as hell spend as much time as possible in it!

I may sounds overly excited, but you have to understand that at home Lance and I sleep in a double-bed, the same from when I was twelve. It has a gorgeous brass bed frame, so I’m reluctant to upgrade to something more adult sized. Besides, it makes king-sized adventures in hotels that much more fun!

From that point on, whenever Lance and I were freed of our sight-seeing duties, we went up to our room and dropped our clothes in a trail from the door to the bed. You could do anythign while lying in this bed: read, write, knit, watch the enormous TV, drink tea, eat snacks. I was fond of lying completely sideways or diagonally, as this giant piece of furniture may have been wider than it was long. I also like burying myself in the sheets and blankets, and making Lance guess where my head and feet were. 

Then, of course, we had lots of spectacular sexy time in the giant bed, as well. It was so cushy and comfy and bouncy, and we could orient ourselves any direction. And don’t think those posts on the corners of the bed frame were neglected; in a situation like this, I am of the mind that some tying up simply must be done. Not having come prepared with any rope or cuffs of anything (what were we thinking??), we had to make do with shoelaces. That worked fine, but my advice if you’re using something thin, like shoelaces, to tie someone up is to be careful about how tight you tie. You always want to keep your circulation to your hands and feet going healhtily, so keep the knots loose. If you give yourself into the fun and fantasy of the experience, you don’t have to necessarily be tied in such a way that you actually can’t get free. Even if the rope is loose, you’ll still feel like you’re in bondage, and that’s what really matters.

So, that’s it for now. We’re back home in Chicago, in our regular double bed. Sigh. Maybe some elf will leave a king-sized under the tree…

xoxo,

Lucy

22 December 7 Permalink

Ex Text

Last week I received a text from a guy I dated for a few months last year. The relationship (or “that time we dated a little bit” as I think of it) ended for various reasons, and we hadn’t spoken at all in, like, 6 months.

So, he asked me the usual questions: are you still in Chicago, how’s work, how’s your family and roommates, are you seeing anyone… I answered somewhat assholishly in one-word replies: yes, good, good, sometimes, you?… Maybe I was too flip with the guy, but the truth is I always felt like he liked me more than I liked him, which made me feel like a jerk. And that’s a lot of the reason I dumped him. And here I was being a jerk again.

This guy is quirky, to say the least. Many things about him are things I knew I could not abide for life, so I thought I’d just stick it out for a while and see where things went. Really, I stuck with it cause he’s kinky. Finding someone with a box of rope under the bed is somewhat rare, but this dude also had safety scissors in case you wanted the rope cut off right quick. He understood the need for and the power of a “safe word.” I was impressed by this guy. He had really thought through all the aspects of kinkdom, and I learned a lot about it through him. But, he had a septum piercing and he prayed to a pagan god before meals, so that was the end of that.

I suspected that the purpose of last week’s text was to send out some feelers as to whether I would jump back into bed with him. My suspicions were confirmed with his follow up to my asking, “you?” He says: “Just OFFICIALLY became “partnered” to one of my lovers. We’re going to give poly a serious try. VERY excited. VERY scary.”

Yeah. For real. C’mon! I mean, “partnered,” “lovers,” who talks like that?! And sends that info to an ex? Well, a guy who wants the ex (me, that is) to come have a poly-good-time (ha, just made that up. Get it? Poly, jolly…) with him and his partner. Is the partner even a guy or a girl? I’ll never know. Because my response was simply, “Wow! Good luck embarking on a new frontier.” He didn’t write back. And that was the end of that.

6 December 2 Permalink