Post(s) tagged with "fellatio"
Blowjobs: Revisited
Dear Lucy, This guy and I have had a thing for a while now and have been hanging out quite a bit lately. While things have been going great, he recently asked me to go down on him.. The thing is it will be my first time going down on anyone and I’m kind of nervous about what to do and not equaling up to his expectations. Do you have any tips that could help me?? I’d really appreciate it! :)
Oh, boy, do I have blowjob tips or what?
In fact, my dear, I have a whole ginormous post about giving fantastic head, entitled LUCY’S GUIDE TO AWESOME BLOWJOBS.
Check it out for such highlights as…
-Is biting good?
-To spit or to swallow?
-All aboard the fast train to orgasm town!
-Commitment: it’s not just for relationships.
-Why I spell it “come.”
…and so much more!
I’d love to know what you all think, and get some more feedback on favorite BJ techniques. So read the guide, then tell me:
How do you like to give or get head?
After taking a poll of all the friends in the room at the time (2 guys, 2 gal. All experienced BJ givers & receivers), my initial thoughts were confirmed: letting it back out is usually the way to go.
To clarify, what I think you mean is that you give a guy a blowjob, he ejaculates in your mouth, and then you open your mouth while he finishes his orgasm. This lets his jizz run out of your mouth, down his dick, and onto his crotch, your hands (if they’re involved), and maybe the bed or whatever surface he’s sitting/laying on. Yes, it’s messy. But if you’re not into swallowing every time, this is a completely acceptable action.
The best way to deal with the mess is to be prepared. While spontaneity is valuable occasionally, if you know you’re getting down into sexy time, you can take a sec to get ready for it. Have a towel handy for clean up, or a dirty t-shirt from the laundry hamper. Lance and I keep a stack of bandannas on his dresser for various household uses; BJ cleanup being a common one. Your dude can also sit on a towel while receiving head, in order to save the sheets, or your Italian leather sofa.
Unless you really love swallowing, you can save it for the times when it’s totes necessary, like giving oral outdoors, or in the car. On such an occasion, mess is not as easy to deal with. You could, however, simply spit out the window, or into a kleenex. Not the classiest move, but understandable.
One more thing: when discussing this subject with my pals, one guy said, “I don’t get this obsession people have with swallowing, anyway.” This led to a healthy debate, which we all came to an agreement on at the end. It was this: swallowing can be fun and sexy if you genuinely like swallowing come. It can also be hot if you like some demeaning domination-type play, wherein you are “forced” to swallow (after a discussion with your partner about the D/s games you’re both consenting to). We think this type of situation may be the root of some people’s beliefs that swallowing is always the way to go. And we end with this: as long as you’re both into it, and communicating well, go for it. If the potential swallower is not on the same page, then it’s not cool to just bust a nut in a somebody’s mouth and expect them to swallow it cause that’s what happens in porn. Be real with each other.
xoxo,
Lucy
P.S. More info on swallowing here
Lucy’s Guide to Awesome Blow Jobs
Dear Lucy, Any tips on blow jobs? And deep throating and positions. Basically everything. Cause I need to blow his mind off, seriously, show him what he’s missing. Thanks!
Dear Lucy, I just started giving blowjobs to my boyfriend and he said I’m good and everything, but I want to be mind-blowing (no pun intended) so do you have any tips?
Oh, sucking dick. What can I say, guys love to get blowjobs. And I don’t mean to brag, but I’m really good at it. And I want you to be too, so check it out:
Every dude’s got their preferences, and hopefully whatever dude you’re blowing will be verbal about his. Blowjobs can have a lot of variety involving hands, lips, tongues, mouth, throat, sucking, licking, humming, you name it. As with all sexual practices, it’s important to ask your man what feels good and what feels great. Or, if your mouth is full, look up at him and raise your eyebrows imploringly.
OK, so let’s start from the beginning. Blowjobs are kind of awesome cause they can happen anytime, anywhere. Unlike cunnilingus or bangin’, fellatio can occur a little more surreptitiously, and be hidden more quickly and easily. You can give head to a guy in bed, in chair, in car, or in an alley if needed. Just unzip and whip it out; that’s step 1.
I like to start a BJ with a lot of teasing. Rub your guy’s crotch before he even takes his pants off, if you wish. Kiss him down his body- lips, neck, chest, nipples, belly, hips, thighs. Just having your beautiful face down near his junk will probably cause him to breathe heavier.
Then start using your hands. Run your fingers gently up and down his shaft, cup his balls, reach around and grab his ass. Follow these actions by doing the same things with your lips: run your lips and tongue lightly up and down his cock, lick and suck on his balls.
When you are ready to make things more intense, wrap your hand around the base of his cock and start to jerk him off kinda slowly. Then, when you’re both good and ready, put the tip of his dick in your mouth. Swirl your tongue around the tip, getting it wet enough to lubricate your lips as you slide them down his shaft. As you move your mouth down (getting more of his cock in your mouth), intersperse this motion with slight upwards motions (pulling his cock out of your mouth a bit). This initial backtracking pattern will get his dick all nice and wet from your mouth, which will make it easier for your lips to glide on his skin.
Once his whole cock is wet, you can play around with speed, motion and technique. The usual blow job motion is moving your head up and down, while using some suction, with his cock going in and out of your mouth. This is great, but you can do so much more! Use your tongue to lick all around his dick while you’re sucking. Turn your head side to side in a rotating motion. A tiny bit of biting might even be nice, but use sparingly.
Some guys really like you to combine constant hand job action with your blowjob, pumping your hand up and down while the tip of his penis is in your mouth. Holding his balls, touching and pressing on his taint, and playing with his asshole are also commonly desired additions to using your mouth to get him off.
(This is getting long, so I’m going to do separate posts on other special BJ techniques, like deep-throating and hummers.)
By now, your jaw might be killing you. Blowjobs are hard work, it’s true, and you might get tired before your guy is ready for you to stop. It’s totally OK to pull your mouth off his member every so often to breathe, swallow some spit, and give your mouth muscles a rest. You can also prolong his train-ride-to-orgasm-town by taking little breaks from straight up suckin it.
I do think practice helps, and after a while your jaw will get used to being open for so long. Dedicate yourself to the task, and you will make your lover very happy. Just don’t do a half-assed job, or you’ll never bring him to the brink. According to my boyfriend, my blowjobs are so kick-ass because of my commitment: I will stick with you til the end, and I will perform enthusiastically the whole time.
Then comes the big final question: to spit, or to swallow. Some folks really dig the taste of jizz, but others think it’s gross. I do believe that it’s pretty unanimous that it feels great on the guy’s part to come in your mouth, so it’s likely you’re going to have to learn to deal with the taste. I don’t think it’s mandatory to swallow every time, but if you want to do it, go right ahead! It’s easier if he ejaculates in the back of your mouth, then you can swallow without it getting all over your tongue, thus minimal tasting.
I think it’s also perfectly acceptable to not swallow. It can be super hot to open your mouth and let his come (I just hate spelling it “cum.“ I know, it’s weird.) run down your face onto your chest. You can also have your man pull out of your mouth right before he reaches orgasm, and he can bust onto your face, tits, chest, tummy, booty, or wherever.
More blowjobbery to come, my darlings. There’s just so much to say! In the meantime, enjoy yourselves, and practice often.
Xoxo, Lucy
Share your fellatio techniques?
Life. Love. Lust.
I'm Lucy. I live in Chicago and I like to talk about sex. Give me a topic: I'm happy to answer any questions about love, sex, and relationships. Email me at LucyRockwell@gmail.com Follow @LucyRockwell
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